SLY FOX 360 #FAIL

slyfox1When Pennsylvania’s own Sly Fox Brewing recently announced the development of a better beer can, I was quite excited. I’d assumed that the world of canovation was reserved for the macro swill hegemony, with research and development budgets aimed at finding ways to deliver product to your gullet as quickly as possible. Yet rather than just some chugability gimmick, Sly Fox’s 360 lid sought to solve an issue inherent with all existing bottles and cans—allowing the drinker to experience the aroma, and thus the full flavor, of craft beer. The top of the can comes right off, transforming into an open vessel, perfect for the beach, picnics, etc.

I’d hoped to try out the technology with an aromatic IPA like Route 113 or Odyssey, but only their Helles and Pils are currently packaged in the new aluminum technology. Curiosity finally got the better of me, and I picked up a Helles can as part of a mixed six-pack on the way home from a long day at the pool. I planned to kick back on the deck and beat the heat by sticking my schnozz into a cold can of lager.

Unfortunately, what follows is a tragedy. It’s about a man, his can, and the limits of human suffering.

Things started well enough. I took a picture of the can, to email to the other Aleheads. Because that’s what I do. You can ask them.

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Then, I tried to open the beer. I popped the top, and pulled with admittedly bulging guns and manly hands.

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The tab ripped right off. I sat gaping as my dream was taken from me, just like that. Luckily, I was not on the beach or at a picnic, but in my kitchen with access to needle nose pliers and other tools.

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I proceeded to nearly sever my radial artery and managed to get the can open another half an inch, spraying a thin film of lager over my stovetop and counter.

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After a few tears, I finally gave up and poured the beer into a Pilsner glass. The jagged metal opening led to a foamy, thoroughly oxygenated rookie pour.

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I retreated to the deck to listen to the dull hiss of cicadas and contemplate my failure.

This was not a scientific experiment. I had one can to play with, and royally fucked it up. I assume they did a ton of research with this design, and that most folks with half a brain would be able to open one. Still, if I was out camping and didn’t have a glass handy, I would surely have killed or maimed myself trying to drink this beer. Have any of our loyal readers had luck with the 360 can? Please let me know in the comments.

Oh, and for the record the beer was tasty. Biscuity malt with a clean finish and just a touch of noble hop bitterness. Refreshing and a nice gateway beer for the cheap lager-swilling uninitiated. Provided you can get it open.

Safe can popping, friends.

Sixpack

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11 comments

  1. Ha ha that is tragic! I didn’t have that bad luck when opening mine. It seemed to come off pretty effortlessly. However, I have seen this happen to a few others. Maybe I just have good luck?

    Cheers guys!

    - Gus
    MDBC

  2. The can looks like it’s laughing at you in the last picture there…

    1. Add a couple googly eyes, I might have my next avatar.

  3. You need to be smarter than the can, Slouch… haha. I have yet to see one of these in person, but now know to be a little cautious with opening one! At least you didn’t have to shotgun it.

    1. Shotgunning was certainly the next viable option– as my daughter watched on, disappointment in her young eyes.

  4. I had no problems with the can, but I can see the tragedy you describe happening rather easily as well. I’m not a big Helles/Pils fan (in general, that is – Sly Fox’s take seems well crafted for both), so I don’t think of this as being that big of a deal though…

  5. Please forgive me for laughing at your pain. Your account is hilarious and at least there was a happy ending.

    1. I forgive you. But just because you asked so nicely.

  6. You must BE the can.

  7. Interesting. I had one of their Pikeland Pils at Citizen’s Bank Park a couple weeks ago. While I did not personally open the can, the woman that sold it to me did not appear to have a problem with the funky new top. Seemed to work well.

  8. Had to laugh, so sorry. Sounds like a good idea but it’s team to head back to the R&D chaulkboard with this can.

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